Control

Looking back, I’d say last year was a bit of a lost year for me. Things I wanted to accomplish got put to the side, I only finished 5 (!!!) projects, and I started eleventy billion new ones. Stress was my co-pilot and I basically shut down.

One good thing that did come out of the year was my interest in bullet journaling. As per my usual habit, I became obsessed with it, and had to Journal All The Things. Oh and buy all the washi tape and stickers I could find. I tried 4 different book styles before I settled on the Happy Planner. I’m doing a bit of a hybrid approach, but I now use one for home and one for work.

One of the journaling groups on Facebook got me thinking. The simple question they asked was, “what is your word for the year?” I had never thought about it that way. Sure I make all the silly resolutions that I have no intention of completing (my attention span is equivalent to a 2 year old on a sugar high), but I’ve never stuck with them.

The more I thought about it, the more I centred around one word. Control.

Some may think that it is a negative implication, but for me, the end result will be a positive one. The less I control, the more anxious I am. I am a tried and true type-A Virgo with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and chronic depression. Not much I can do about it, but be aware of signs and triggers that tell me when I’m not coping well. By journaling, I am able to see connections and triggers that I never would have been aware of before.

Here is what I am aiming to control.

  • Finances. Be a grownup, make a budget and stick to it. Track track track where money is going
  • Stash. No input without output.
  • Health. Mine hasn’t been the best lately, and Cheffie has had some health challenges that pre-occupied us over the last two years.
  • Reaction. Listen to what is really being said, not what I assume is being said. Think about it, then respond.
  • Stress. Learn that as much as Control is the word for the year, some things truly are beyond my locus of control. Learn to let those issues go.

I have various plans in place to support each of these groupings. I will be tracking them in my Happy Planner as the year goes on, and for the first time in a long time, I’m feeling pretty good about things.

One thought on “Control

  1. That’s a great plan. It is a word that I have associated with you most of our relationship. It is neither negative or positive letting go of what you can’t control has always been difficult because it affected every area of your life. I’m excited for you. Being able to recognize patterns and make plans accordingly will make the difference for you.

    Hope! It’s nice to hear that you have some again.

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